BARNEY!
GOOD with FEMALE dogs, NO cats, OLDER kids 10+
Are you looking for a pint-sized, amazing, little man in your life?? Well, HERE I AM!!!! My name is Barney, and I am 3 years old. I absolutely love life!!! There is nothing that makes me sad, and I just want to have the best time in everything I do. They call me a low-rider. I had to Google what that was because I had no clue what it meant. Do you know how many options there were for the words “low-rider”? Heavens! There were a ton!! There were songs, cars, motorcycles, and a lot of other options to choose from. I couldn’t choose a song that I liked that fit my personality, and motorcycles just seemed scary to own, and I am not scary in the least, but the cars looked AMAZING, so I chose to compare myself to a car even though I look NOTHING like a car, just in case you were wondering. First, I learned that low-riders are called that because they sit low to the ground compared to other cars. Well, guess what, I got some short legs, and I get pretty darn close to the ground! Not enough to scrape my belly, but I sure don’t have to bend down far to find scraps of food left behind! Then, I learned that low-riders sometimes will also have these things called hydraulics that can make them bounce around and do tricks that normal cars can’t do. Well, let me tell you, I have hydraulics built into my rear end!! Whenever I get excited about something, my whole tail end gets going, and my butt will wiggle and wiggle like crazy!! Cars bounce, I wiggle. Next, I learned that some cars that are low-riders with hydraulics can also balance on their sides on their front and rear wheels and cruise down the road. Well, if you push the right button, I will roll right over on my side and wait for you to give me belly rubs!!! Oh heavens I love those so much!! Then, just like people love to ride in a low-rider because it is cool and makes them feel good, I LOVE to be around people. I think people are the greatest, and I just can’t get enough of them. You will never find me far from my person and just loving on them. When it comes to owning a low-rider, most guys want one to impress the ladies and have them want to ride with him in it. Well, that is all that I want to hang with. I want to only be with the lady dogs. I can’t have any boys cramping my style, so I choose to be with only the ladies. Sorry fella’s, but I can’t worry about competition. Next, as a low-rider, I have a reputation to protect as the big man on the streets. I can’t have people thinking I am not as cool as I am, and therefore, I need to hang around only those who can hang in the big leagues size-wise. I can’t be with smaller animals like cats or small dogs. It’s nothing personal, but I have a reputation to protect, and the little ones just don’t fit the bill, so that’s a no-go in my circle. Again, nothing personal because I’m sure they are great, but I can’t take chances when it comes to being a cool dude on the streets. Sorry. Lastly, just like low-riders show their fancy moves based on the information their computers provide, I too come with a built-in computer that will show you how smart I am. My brain works on rapid fire, like a computer, and I am eager to please and will do anything for a treat. I know how to go outside to use the bathroom, and I do amazing in my crate. I am the quintessential low-rider. So, while I am cruising the house for snacks left behind that no one else sees, because I’m closer to the ground then they are, you head on over and fill out my application for my pink slip. Trust me, you will be the envy of others when you take me out on the streets for a drive, so don’t pass me up!! Checking for you in my rear-view mirror with love, Barney (updated 05/26/20)
